Wedding Regrets

Yesterday, we visited Landshut and St. Martinskirche, a Gothic church with the highest brick tower (131 meters; 430 ft) in the world. Next to it is a smaller "Women's Chapel." We went inside and found this very intimate chapel that was a little worn, but still quite beautiful. While sitting there looking at the frescos on the ceiling A. said to me, "You know, sometimes I wish we had gotten married somewhere like this."

We got married in Las Vegas and it was sort of a spur-of-the-moment kind of thing. It was a little bit better planned than some Vegas weddings, (I reserved the chapel about a month in advance and sent an announcement to people) but it was sort of an add-on to a trip we were taking anyway. My mom, dad, step-mom, sister, and aunt were there. We got a little dressed-up, said our "I dos," and were out of there and on our way to dinner (paid for by Dad) about 30 minutes later. That was it. It was fun and funtional.

Unlike some girls who plan their weddings from the time they are six, I honesty never really had an idea of what sort of wedding I wanted. I thought the chances that I would get married were very slim, so when I actually decided to get married, the Vegas thing seemed to be as good as anything.

However, after we got married and the happier I was being married, the more I thought about the kind of wedding I wished I would have had. Shortly after moving here, I saw a dress in a bridal shop window that would have been perfect and though I am not religious, I envisioned a small ceremony in a chapel like the one we saw yesterday. (I guess certain fantasies pounded into little girls' heads die hard.)

With the exception of the fact that I briefly mentioned to A. that I had seen the dress, I have never told him that while I don't regret getting married, sometimes I wish we would have done something more for our wedding. Yesterday, when he expressed basically the same thing that I had been thinking off and on for some time now, tears came to my eyes. I am not hopelessly romantic (actually the exact opposite), but it was the sweetest thing he has ever said to me and made me realize just how much I love him.

I guess we could always renew our vows in a ceremony, and I could buy that dress and we could find a little chapel like that, but it just wouldn't be the same. Today I am just so sad that I didn't take more time to think about our wedding and what I could have had.